Nobody likes to be last. So when it comes to Utah being dead last on WalletHub’s Best & Worst States for Women’s Equality and other rankings, it can be tempting to find an excuse. I regularly hear from Utah leaders that gender disparities in our state are a result of “women’s own choices.” And because of this, they dismiss the rankings and the extensive research that continues to highlight the challenges that women face in our state.
But “choice” is often an illusion. Let me explain.
Many of our life decisions are influenced by the expectations of others that subtly guide us in certain directions, often without us realizing it. Many girls and young women hear a lifetime of messages that include, for example: “Good women sacrifice and ask for little in return.” “You should only care for yourself after you have cared for everyone else.” “Women are helpers not leaders.” “Men are better suited for leadership roles.”
In fact, by the time a young woman reaches 18 years old, her choices are often the culmination of years of social conditioning. Let me provide three examples of how this conditioning impacts women.
First, even more than those around the nation, Utah women choose college majors that are more female dominated. Although these traditional majors are important programs to explore — we need more great teachers, for example — there are so many other fields to consider, as well. However, if the only messages a young woman has received throughout her life center around a narrow set of professions — those that typically pay less — she may never consider other possibilities. She may have the natural talents around biology, information technology, business or law, but if she has never been introduced to or encouraged to explore those professions, she will gravitate to those she has been socialized to think are more acceptable for women. So, my question is this: Is the choice to pursue a traditionally feminine field of study 100% her choice?
Second, consider the gender pay gap. Most Utahns understand there is a serious gap and know that Utah women make less money than their male counterparts — even when they have the same or similar experience, education and position. Yet I still hear from some Utah decision makers that they are not concerned. In fact, I recently heard someone say, “If women in Utah would just learn to negotiate better, all of the gender pay gap issues would be resolved.” This assumption doesn’t consider the mounds of research that confirm that girls, particularly in more conservative cultures, are taught from birth they should be selfless and not ask for what they need. And, because of this, it is significantly more difficult for most women to ask for raises than for men. And if women do ask for higher wages, more often than not, their bosses — both men and women — judge them harshly for even asking. So, when a woman works for less than men around her — even though she has the same responsibilities, the same educational background and the same number of years of experience — is that 100% her choice? Add the prevalence of salary secrecy to the equation and it helps to explains why Utah has one of the widest gender pay gaps in the nation.
Finally, research findings show that Utah is among the bottom three states for mammography screenings, has the highest depression rate in the nation for women and ranks 46th of 50 states in women’s preventative healthcare. Again, we may be tempted to blame women for their “choice” to not get their annual mammography screening or schedule their preventative visit to their healthcare provider, but is there something else going on? Of course there is. Even though often well-intentioned, could it be related to those messages that girls and women receive that good women sacrifice and ask for little in return or that women should care for themselves only after they have cared for everyone else? If so, should we be putting the blame solely on women for their choices to not comply with these medical guidelines? Of course not.
Yes, the choices we make do lead to different outcomes, but choices about fields of study, pay and healthcare are not made in a vacuum for any of us. And when our culture signals to women and girls that ambition, assertiveness and self-care are selfish, these messages are internalized and options are narrowed.
As Utahns, we need to consider the deep cultural messages that impact women (and men) for good and bad. Instead of throwing around blame and jumping to conclusions, let’s seek deeper understanding and potential solutions. Although a woman’s choice is often an illusion, we can choose to do better.
Susan R. Madsen
Susan R. Madsen, Ed.D., is the inaugural Karen Haight Huntsman Endowed Professor of Leadership and executive director of the Utah Women & Leadership Project at the Jon M. Huntsman School of Business at Utah State University.
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