In a niche corner of the internet, you’ll find a group of men who virtually gather to discuss one topic: fatherhood. But this isn’t your typical dad support group. This is one themed on the cultural phenomenon that is “Bluey,” an Australian cartoon about a family of dogs.
How is it that a kids cartoon has captured the hearts of so many adults — namely adult males? One could argue that the father figure featured in the show, Bandit, is inspiring dads and men everywhere to be better fathers and better people.
He has certainly done that for me.
Bandit has taught me a great deal about what it means to be a dad. He’s taught me that it’s OK to admit you’re wrong to your kids. He has taught me to savor the moments when you’re playing with your kids — because they won’t always want to. He’s also taught me that it’ll be the little things that your kids remember about their childhood. It’ll be the funny voices you make, the games you come up with and the park you usually go to. You don’t have to go on regular, expensive vacations to make your kids’ childhoods memorable.
“Bluey” does an incredible job at approaching seemingly difficult to understand topics for children (and even their parents). Bluey tackles emotionally heavy concepts such as infertility, sudden life changes and even death and loss.
I’m not the only one inspired by Bandit. In fact, I just might be part of a shift in parenting styles.
Traditional American gender roles dictate that the mother is the loving, nurturing parent and the father is the financial provider and protector. But now it seems as if fathers are wanting to be just as involved in the child rearing and nurturing. The gender roles among parents are blurring.
A study done by the University of Warwick found that in 1982, 43% of fathers admitted that they had never changed a diaper. By the year 2000, that percentage was at 3%. Of all the dads I personally know, I can’t even fathom any of them refusing to change a diaper. (I mean, what are you? Too good for poop?)
My mind goes to a woman who was working the front desk of the hospital when our son was just two days old. As we approached the desk, she met me with piercing eyes, then shifted her gaze over to my wife’s.
She asked, “Is he changing diapers?” Pointing a pen in my face.
“Oh! Of course, he’s doing a lot,” my wife said. I gave a quiet sigh of relief.
“Well, consider yourself lucky. My first were twins. And my now ex-husband refused to change a single diaper,” said the woman.
I swear I could see steam coming out of her ears.
Our little Bluey is three. And I can’t get enough of him. He is a never ending ball of energy. I’m pretty sure he is living proof that the law of conservation of energy doesn’t exist. Because he seems to have an endless supply.
Am I Mr. Wonder-Dad? Absolutely not. Am I guilty of throwing on “Ms. Rachel” for my son after a long day so I can scroll on my phone? Absolutely. There are days where I get extremely frustrated. My son is a daily reminder that I am imperfect. I’m not as patient and understanding as I thought I was. But he’s also a daily motivation to improve. For both our sakes.
Parenting could be a measuring stick that society is improving. If negative parenting habits are caught, acknowledged and replaced with positive ones, generations will only improve upon one another. And the exceptional will become the standard.
Gone are the days of plopping down on a La-Z-Boy after work and watching the game with a cold beer in hand — being oblivious to what your wife is making for dinner or what toy your child is playing with. Now are the days of involvement, nurturing and understanding.
It’s not enough for a dad to only provide financially anymore. A father should be there to support their children in many ways.
So take some notes from a cartoon dog who lives down under. Be involved in your kids’ lives. Be fun. Be funny. Be loud and immature. It feels quite good to be a kid again.
And if you would like to join the Facebook group, search for “Bandits: The Bluey Group For Dads.”
(Samantha Owens) Ian Scott lives in Spanish Fork. He is the proud husband to his high school sweetheart and a father of a 3 year-old boy.
Ian Scott lives in Spanish Fork. He is the proud husband to his high school sweetheart and a father of a 3 year-old boy.
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