What BYU’s LGBTQ students think of the new Jeffrey Holland speech requirement — and how they’re fighting for inclusivity

Provo • When Steven Kapp Perry attended Brigham Young University, he would hear the words of former school President Ernest Wilkinson replay in his head each time he walked into the student union building named for the leader.

The university, Wilkinson famously said, does not “intend to admit to our campus any homosexuals. … We do not want others on this campus to be contaminated by your presence.”

Perry kept quiet about his identity then. But now, 40 years later, he works at BYU as an openly gay man and says he is accepted. And he smiles to think that even though the student union has the same name, it is now home to the school’s Office of Belonging that is meant to help all students, including those who are LGBTQ+, feel safe and welcome on campus.

It’s not perfect, said Perry, 64, said into a microphone, but “there has been some progress.”

More than 150 members of the Provo community — largely current BYU students and recent graduates who are LGBTQ+ — filled the sidewalks in front of him and outside the historic courthouse here late last month. They came to acknowledge the hurt that continues over their identities but also the strides they have made at the private school sponsored by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This year, the annual gathering was as much a commemoration as a celebration.

And the Wilkinson Student Center, they said, is a fitting example of that mix.

“It’s like we take two steps forward, one step back,” said freshman Kate Wickham, who is queer, flipping the phrase to say that the students feel like they’re moving forward at a slightly faster clip than the setbacks — even if those changes take time.

The group marched to a nearby park for a drag show, stretching across a full city block as they made their way.

The Latter-day Saint temple in downtown Provo could be seen across the street from where the students started, forming a pointed outline as they spoke and danced in head-to-toe rainbow outfits. One woman wore a rainbow cowgirl hat. Another had on a rainbow Hawaiian shirt she found at the thrift store in the “dad section” — “but no dad is going to wear this,” Britta Davis said with a laugh. There were tutus and flashy eye makeup and strap-on butterfly wings. And when the sky threatened to literally rain on their parade, they popped out rainbow umbrellas.

The most recent announcement that has roiled students is that BYU will require incoming freshmen to read Latter-day Saint apostle Jeffrey Holland’s controversial speech from 2021 in which he criticized faculty and students who challenge the church’s teachings against same-sex marriage.

Holland had encouraged members to take up their intellectual “muskets” to defend “marriage as the union of a man and a woman.” The faith leader also questioned why a BYU valedictorian a few years earlier had chosen to “commandeer a graduation podium” when he came out as gay during his commencement speech.

The leader’s remarks came the same day that the school created the Office of Belonging.

Speaking in public for the first time since the announcement, students said during the rally that being forced to revisit that past speech would be harmful to those in the LGBTQ+ community. They say it is a slide backward after the school has, in recent years, held more events and panels openly talking about and including students who are gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender.

And they booed Holland’s name when he was mentioned in one of the speeches at the start of the event.

BYU still bans students from engaging in any same-sex romantic behavior. Those who break that rule on or off campus can face consequences, up to being expelled. But students say they have been beginning to feel like they have a place at the school and can be visible as they are.

“It’s very back and forth,” added Cami, a BYU junior who is bisexual. The Salt Lake Tribune agreed to use only her first name for privacy.

She feels like the church has been trying to be more inclusive, including no longer labeling LGBTQ+ couples as apostates. And in 2022, the church gave its support to a proposed federal law that would codify marriages between same-sex couples (though the church’s doctrine for members on marriage being only between a man and woman remains unchanged).

At the same time, gay individuals can be accepted as members of the faith and participate only if they don’t act on their feelings of same-sex attraction. Perry, for instance, is married to a woman, who joined him at the event.

It’s possible the school would not welcome him or a faculty member if they were married to a person of the same sex. Faculty have said in the recent past they have been let go just for advocating for the LGBTQ community; Perry acknowledged that in his speech.

Even the event, held by the Cougar Pride Center, is not allowed on campus — where LGBTQ clubs and gatherings are prohibited.

So requiring the Holland speech now, added Cami’s friend and classmate, Megan Johnson, who is also bisexual, is “disappointing but not surprising.”

Trying to figure out whether the progress is larger than the pain is like trying to count the grains of sand on two sides of an hourglass as it’s being tipped back and forth. The progress is slow, Johnson said, and the setbacks frequent. But they are still showing up — and even the community response in conservative and LDS-leaning Utah County appears to be warming.

The students and graduates marching down Center Street were met with honks and waves from cars passing by. A few neighbors stood along the route and waved supportive posters. One shouted at the marchers, “I’m so glad you’re here.”

As she walked with the parade, Wickham said she decided to come to BYU as a queer student because she wanted to be part of a shift for the school to be more accepting. The event confirmed that choice for her.

The group listened to Katy Perry’s song “I Kissed a Girl” on loudspeakers as they walked past the town sign that says, “Provo welcomes the world.” There were nearly as many pride flags as participants.

April Flowers, the drag name for BYU junior Aaron Rodriquez, was one of the performers at the park. Dressed in a yellow sparkly dress and a towering blue wig, Flowers aimed to look like Marge Simpson from the animated TV show “The Simpsons.”

Flowers said she has had to fight discrimination at BYU. In 2021, she said, a roommate threatened her with a gun, in part because of her identity. She reported him to the Honor Code Office, but she said nothing happened with her report.

“With events like tonight,” she said, “we get to focus on celebrating our queerness instead of fighting for it, like we’re normally doing.”

Flowers danced on stage to Dolly Parton and Cyndi Lauper in a pair of platform pink Crocs. She had a Teletubbies doll in her purse and couldn’t stop smiling. A few years ago, she doesn’t think she could have been up there, in front of a crowd, and not been kicked out of BYU.

Her mom, Joy Rodriguez, beamed, too, from the audience. “I’m really proud of her,” she said. “She’s still teaching us.”

They both said they hope progress will continue — on an individual level and an institutional level.

In between drag performances, over the loudspeakers, played recordings from past school leaders making disparaging comments about LGBTQ+ individuals. One said, “God’ll get you good if you don’t follow the rules.” Another talked about shock conversion therapy that happened on campus to try to make gay students straight.

This time, Perry wasn’t hearing them in his head. Everyone could hear them.

But, he said, he has given up the shame he once had because of those words. He said he wants to be open and available for any students to feel safe talking to him. He said he wants to be present at BYU for years to come. He said he wants more progress.

“Simply existing,” Perry noted, “is something that gives hope to people.”