It’s been 13 years since Molly Bitton last made memories with her late husband, Derek. She holds on tightly to the ones she does have.

They met in 1999 at Salt Lake City club Area 51. He was a returned Latter-day Saint missionary; she was returning home from a year of living in New Jersey.

“It was like an immediate thing,” Bitton said. “We went from not knowing each other at all to spending every minute together.”

So, Derek ended up quitting his job to work with Bitton in construction. The two framed houses side by side.

Derek, Bitton said, was flirty and funny, with a bright smile and beautiful eyes that grew animated when he was in a good mood.

These are the things that Bitton remembers now that Derek is gone. In 2013, he died by suicide. Since then, Bitton has turned to community to navigate her grief. That’s why she started hosting “Have You Met” events for people looking to form real-life connections.

From running to paying it forward

Around the time of Derek’s death, Bitton said, the two were struggling in their marriage. Derek was dealing with addiction issues.

“I loved him so much, and I saw so much good in him that he did not see, and I couldn’t make it better. So, when it happened, it broke me,” Bitton said.

After, she turned to running. A lover of marathons and Ragnar races alike, Bitton said it was her running community that “saved her.”

That community — “her people” — accepted her without judgment, regardless of whether she was having a good or bad day.

“They never made me feel broken,” she said. “They made a world of difference and I don’t even know if they understand that.”

Fast forward half a dozen years or so, to the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic: Bitton decided she wanted to help people find that sense of community that helped save her.

She’d been hosting running events for years. But as she talked with her running friends, many said they were tired of being ghosted, among other dating app pains. They all had the same question: Where do they connect with singles in real life?

Last June, Bitton brought together around 100 runners for a singles 5K. Now, she does it regularly through her events and has expanded past running: they have karaoke, Topgolf and game-oriented nights.

“These events give a very easy way to approach people because we put on a lot of icebreakers and a lot of challenges,” Bitton said. “We’re all on the same playing ground. It reduces a lot of the anxiety and the fear of approaching others.”

She hopes the real connections can conquer the fatigue of swiping culture.

Bitton said hosting these events is a way to pay tribute to the community she found during the depths of her grief.

“I provide a safe space for them to be whoever they want to be, which is what I needed when Derek passed,” Bitton said.

Note to readers • This article discusses suicide. If you or people you know are at risk of self-harm, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for 24-hour support.

Correction • Sept. 21 at 11:30 a.m.: This story has been updated to correct the name of Bitton’s late husband.