Last week, my wife and I went to Cedar City and watched a couple of sword fights. Nobody got killed. It was William Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet.”
Spoiler alert • Thanks to hormones and social idiocy, everyone in the play gets killed or feels just awful in the end.
There are no gunfights or car chases in the play, but a public advisory was posted anyway. “The love story between two teenagers includes Shakespeare’s usual puns and innuendo and may not be suitable for preteens.”
After years of Hollywood trauma, my senses must be dulled. I didn’t see or hear anything untoward, but then no one has ever called me innocent or easily offended.
Back to the Bard. The boards were trod in the Engelstad Shakespeare Theater, an outdoor venue whose very design spoke to me of both 12th-century ambiance and “This is going to be way over your head.”
I confess that the acclaimed brilliance of Shakespeare is wasted on my knave’s pate. I simply don’t get the attraction. Before the play, my only exposure to “Romeo and Juliet” was the radio phonetic alphabet I used as a cop.
Dispatch • “Unit 10, Romeo Tango Juliet 482 shows 10-99 [stolen] out of Tooele County.”
Me • “10-4. Show me 10-7 [out of service].”
My primary problem with Shakespeare — and it is MY problem — is that most of the time, I don’t even know what is being said.
The world marked the 400th anniversary of the birth of William Shakespeare in 1964. The poet-playwright was born April 23,1564 at Stratford-Upon-Avon, England. He also died on that date 52 years later. Above is the famed Martin Droeshout engraving of the dramatist, printed on the cover of Shakespeare's first Folio, or first complete collection of his plays, printed in 1623. (AP Photo)
Last week, some of this problem was related to the distance we were from the actors, eardrums dulled by years of gunfire, and being seated at such a sharp angle to the stage that lip reading was impossible.
Not that I would have understood what was being said anyway. “Romeo and Juliet” is conducted in an English full of archaic words — “’tis,” “hath” and “villain“ — as in “’Tis but thy bowels hath filled a villain’s boots.”
It’s like listening to woo being pitched in the voice of the most stern Old Testament prophet. Speaking of propriety, did you know that Juliet is only 13 when she marries Romeo? Yeah. She is.
Love the play all you want, but if such a beautifully romantic thing actually happened today, the friar who married them (and probably even Romeo himself) would be out at Point of the Mountain.
None of this is to say that I hated the play. I came away with a bit of culture on me. All of the actors performed admirably — or did so to the best of my uninformed judgment.
One actor really drew me in. Redge Palmer played the part of Peter, the perpetually addled servant to Juliet’s nurse. Palmer perfectly portrayed my own, “What the hell is going on now?” For me, he stole the show.
The choreography — including the sword fighting, of which there isn’t enough — was well done. I acknowledge a hope of seeing a sword point exit someone’s back. Alas, like the love between Romeo and Juliet, it was not meant to be.
There’s still time to see the production, as well as other plays at the Utah Shakespeare Festival. Check out www.bard.org and get a little culture on you.
| Courtesy Karl Hugh Betsy Mugavero is Juliet and Shane Kenyon is Romeo. Utah Shakespeare Festival production.
