This is an archived article that was published on sltrib.com in 2007, and information in the article may be outdated. It is provided only for personal research purposes and may not be reprinted.
There's such a barrage of reality shows swallowing up our television time, it's hard to keep track of who's schmoozing whom and who's been doing the backstabbing. Here's the cooler talk about last week's episodes of some of your favorite reality fare, written by The Salt Lake Tribune's resident unscripted-TV buffs. (Warning: Spoilers ahead. If you didn't watch last week, read at your own risk.)
So You Think You Can Dance
Wednesdays, 7 p.m., and Thursdays, 8 p.m., KSTU Channel 13
Warning: Physical weakness will not be tolerated! After Jessi missed the competition segment because she got dehydrated and felt faint, she was required to solo. But her funky robot dance bombed and she's gone.
Best Whine and Cheese Moment
Jesus cried as he said goodbye after judges gave him the boot, tearfully explaining that his goal for getting on the show was to blaze a trail for other ghetto kids. It was a much better performance than his middling ballet-influenced solo. Good luck, kid.
Pirate Master
Thursdays, 7 p.m., KUTV Channel 2
The Lowdown
The crew plundered more treasure ($40,000) and made Azmyth the captain again. But it was Sean, the ship's most excellent cook, who got burned for double-crossing an officer by lying on a previous vote. Sean was "cut adrift" and voted out, and the crew now has to eat nasty grub for the rest of the season.
Best Whine and Cheese Moment
Christa, like many reality contestants with kids, began sobbing when she said she's doing this all for her little baby and that the money could give her and her child a better life. We can see how leaving your kid for a TV show helps!
Top Chef
Wednesdays, 8 p.m., Bravo
The Lowdown
The 13 remaining chefs were tasked with updating meatloaf, pork chops and applesauce and making the meal more healthy. You could almost hear producers cackling when snotty South African Micah said, "Meatloaf and mashed potatoes? I'm thinking that won't be too hard to improve upon." One of the judges actually proclaimed "Yuck!" when he tasted Micah's dish, and she was soon gone.
Best White and Cheese Moment
When the "Quickfire Challenge" required contestants to create a shellfish dish in 30 minutes, Las Vegas chef Hung looked around and said, "Everyone's just throwing shellfish with white wine. Yeah, it's simple, but my monkey can do that." Someone's going to take a swing at this guy during sweeps.
Contributing: Dan Nailen, Anne Wilson and Vince Horiuchi