This is an archived article that was published on sltrib.com in 2007, and information in the article may be outdated. It is provided only for personal research purposes and may not be reprinted.

Rep. Chris Cannon missed out on the major hearing this week: the testimony of the best-known covert agent, Valerie Plame, before the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee. Cannon is a member of the committee but flew back to Utah and skipped his chance to quiz Plame.

However, Scooter Libby leaked us a list of the questions that Cannon planned to ask had he been there:

Miss Plame, did you obtain double-0 status? Do you now or have you ever had a License to Kill?

Do you have any fun gadgets with you today? Is your watch a Geiger counter? Does your car have oil slicks and turn invisible? Does your lapel pin shoot a tranquilizer dart?

Who has traditionally been a greater threat to America: Goldfinger or Dr. No?

Lastly, I have obtained a nuclear weapon and placed it aboard a satellite that will fall into the earth's surface in 48 hours unless I am paid $10 billion.

You have 10 minutes to act before the poison coursing through your veins renders you paralyzed. How do you respond? Feel free to answer while I maniacally stroke my cat.

Presidential Madness

The NCAA tournament is in full swing, so it's too late to submit a bracket, but you can still compare your picks to presidential candidate John McCain in the McCain Basketball Bracket challenge (http://www.johnmccain.com /brackets/).

For the record, McCain picked against Weber State but had Brigham Young going to the second round. The Wildcats went down as he predicted, but the Cougars didn't pull out a win.

We're both doing better in the first round but didn't enter, so we can't win the fleece jacket or pin, either.

The irony, as noted by Keith Olberman on MSNBC, is that McCain has introduced legislation in the past prohibiting all forms of gambling on college sports.

Mitt Romney's campaign hoped to do something similar, but Mitt had trouble settling on which teams to pick. Virginia Tech vs. Illinois? "I love that team." Kentucky vs. Villanova? "I've always supported them." UCLA vs. Weber State? "You betcha!"

For some reason, Rudy Giuliani only filled in the left side of the bracket and Democrat John Edwards' consultants are still focus-grouping the Georgetown-Belmont match-up. We could go on and on, but you get the idea.

Games are obviously under way, so, as Hillary would say: Play ball, y'all!

Romney's friends

Mitt Romney has racked up a lot of new friends on his online Facebook profile, a new goal for presidential candidates who in reality probably have never visited the Web community. (Romney told The Associated Press he didn't even know he had a profile there.)

On the site, Romney fans can post messages on his "Wall," a sort of bulletin board. Some are the expected comments such as this:

"Mitt, idea - sell overpriced T-shirts on your Web site. I'd like to buy one, you'd like my money. See how this all works out?" - Adam

And, of course, the Mormon connection:

"It is so exciting to see a good and faithful member of the church running for president. I've heard so much on the news how the public doesn't know much about Mormons - and this is a great way to get them interested and teaching them more! I can't wait to see how your run goes and the new investigators it may bring! Keep going strong Brother Romney!" - Katherine

And then there's the anti-Democrats:

"GO MITT ROMNEY!! [You're] THE MAN!! I hope Hillary doesn't get up in office. . . . If so, we're gonna all be speaking Arabic in a year." - Tim

And the straight-up requests:

"Hey Mitt, tell all your Mormon buddys to stop coming to my house at like 10 a.m. Saturday morning when I'm trying to sleep . . . thanks." - Matt